Marriage, Kids... and The Ex!

Today I am grateful for my Ex... oh yes I did! I totally went there! You're probably thinking that I have completely lost the plot right now... and am headed straight for crazy town. Believe me, sometimes I feel like I am headed for there too. Or, that I have geared up my luscious lips with Chanel 60 - Rouge Troublant (if you don't know what this is... it's a shit hot red) lipstick in preparation of some serious ass kissing. But this isn't what is happening here... because it ain't no Chanel, it's a 2 dollar shop lippy in red... Jokes!

I have many reasons to be grateful for my Ex. We have some great memories we shared together, we also have some pretty shit ass ones too. We had a beautiful wedding... I looked shit hot by the way... we shared that memory with some of our closest friends and family some still with us, some, unfortunately, are not.

We shared many years together, happy, as you naturally do in a long-term relationship... and then a few, definitely not so happy... and if it wasn't for him, I wouldn't have the two most amazing little girls aged 6 & 9, both going on  27. Believe me, those girls are definitely something for me to brag about, appreciate and constantly learn from... They inspire me to always strive to be a better version of myself... but I will get to them in a separate post.

I am grateful for my Ex, not only because of obvious things (my two babies) but because of who I have grown into today, with our turbulent (especially the end) relationship playing its contribution.  Now, I am not going to go into the nitty-gritty and the, he said she said bullshit for our failed relationship. But, what I will say and what I know is at the time we were Mr & Mrs right for each other, that we grew over time as individuals...not together, and have both moved on into the relationships we need to be/deserve to be in. I recently stumbled across a quote (unsure of the author) that puts my statement into prospective... it stated:

I think that this works both ways, that there is a lot of truth to this, but most importantly for me... I think the last part needs to change to... for herself.  How awesome does that sound: "sometimes a man's purpose is a woman's life is to help her become a better woman... for herself' If my limits were not tested... if the things that happened between us didn't... I probably would be spending my life, limiting my capabilities and strengths and doing the same old shit that most people do - growing up in a 'little' town.

I got out, I believed, I grew, I learnt to love myself and spent my time making me happy (and obviously my kids)... I stopped focusing my happiness on making someone else happy. I am stronger, happier and more successful in every way and the relationship with my Ex and the ending contributed to giving me that much-needed nudge. Maybe it was more like a push, like - bitch get up...live a little... for yo'self!

When I look at my life now, what I have achieved - in such a short period of time, what Zac (I'll get to my Fiance's appreciate post later too) provide for the girls, I can't help but be grateful for the Ex! I wouldn't have my awesome job, life and my awesome Zac if my Ex was till my Mr... Let's be honest here, sometimes it's really fucking hard to be grateful for my Ex. But hey, this is a 365-day gratitude blog, to cleanse the soul and inspire... not a hard to be grateful sometimes 'cause some people drive you batshit crazy blog.

Hold on to your panties, shit is about to get real!